Throughout my years of playing fantasy sports I have gone through quite a few team names. With this seasons football team I just created, my total is now at a solid 50 teams in 4 years. Thats a lot, I know, most of which came in 2007 when I had my single year record of 18 teams ranging from baseball, basketball, football, March Madness, and even a golf team in there. Golf isn’t any fun, don’t play it. Anyway, for this post I would like to divulge you, my audience, with some of the names I have given my teams. Most I think of on my own, some I gather from outside, but since the start of last football season I have vowed never to have the same name twice!
In the spirit of the season, the lists must begin with baseball names. In years past I’ve had Cook’s Crushers, DC’s Beasties, and even stooped as low as VUSC Lions. However, this season brings out the true creative, and fun nature of fantasy sports. My current team name is LinceCUM in my pants. A parody of the SNL short “Jizz in my pants” and last years AL Cy Young winner Tim Lincecum.
– Other favorite baseball team names are: Angels and Damons, The Good, the Vlad, and the Uggla, Scared Pitchless, Easton Fections, Multiple Scoregasms, and finally, Beaten with the Uggla stick. I know there were two Dan Uggla references, but be happy, there could have been so many more.
Moving onto Americas favorite fantasy sport, football. It is estimated that roughly 22% of males in America between the ages of 18 and 49 have at least one fantasy football team. That comes out to about 27 MILLION men, and thats not even taking into account those who have multiple teams, like myself (3 so far). Football is a bit easier to make up names for because there are more high profile athletes in the NFL compared to the MLB. Last season my name offering was a self-created idea that I thought was not to harsh, yet got the point across: Kiss my ASStroturf.
– My list to choose from for this year include; I’m Romo-sexual, I just Witten my pants, Marions Barbarians, Addai another day, and Plaxicos Ammo. The one I settled on is a bit on the “Not PC” side of things, but it’s clever I think, and I mean no insult with it, of course: 1st Downs Syndrome
Onto my personal favorite, basketball. Basketball has even more big names than football, and has smaller squads, which makes the players the most recognizable athletes in America. With so many international players and a fresh batch of rookies coming into the league, the possibilities are almost endless. This list will be a bit longer than the rest because as stated before, it’s my favorite, and I have thought long and hard about them.
– Farmar‘s Market, Puff the Magic Johnson, Boom Boom Pau, the Bosh pit, Derek Fisher of men, And Thabeet goes on…, Lamar Scrotum, Pietrus and Cream, Bynum-ite!, Medi-Okur, Wade a minute, You’re a Dirk!, I’m just Kidd-ing around, LA Clippers Blake Griffins, and my favorite with the help of a top 15 draft pick… with a side of Curry!
There you have it folks, that should be enough usable names to get you through a few seasons. You can use any you want, just let me know in a comment who you are and which name you used, just out of curiosity!
Complete unbias does not exist . . . but I'm as close as it comes! 